* Disclaimer ... not my normal type of post.
Every night, Dan and Manny spend Daddy/son time together in Dan’s office. They play toys and watch a little TV. Last night, I happened to walk in to use the fax machine and Kipper was on. I wasn’t listening attentively but then suddenly a phrase jumped out and struck me.
Kipper was reading a “Get well” card. He said, “I don’t want to get well soon. I want to get well NOW.”
And it hit me! Isn’t that the truth? Don’t we all?
No one wants to suffer for hours, days or longer when we could be feeling better instantly. And I wondered why we have ever used that phrase of “Get well soon”?
What if we stuck our faith out there? What if we prayed like we actually BELIEVED the person could be healed? Would more people actually be healed? Even some “Faith healers” could do better in this department in my opinion. They often say the right words but then almost put a disclaimer on it just in case the miracle doesn’t happen. Does God need an “Out?”
I don’t think so. I truly believe we need to stick our faith out there more. Hope BIG. Pray BIG. Afterall, we serve a HUGE God. What if we gave Him room to operate in our lives on a Grander scale?
And at the same time, how about James 2: 14-17?
Paraphrased … What good is it if you say you have faith but do nothing to help. What if you see a person without clothes and food and all you say to them is, “I hope you find some clothes and food” and do nothing about their physical needs , what good is it? Faith without action is worthless.
As you can imagine, with a family like mine, I spend a lot of time thinking about healing, faith and actions. Many people seem to find that right “balance” in regards to our family. But honestly, many do not.
I think most people just don’t know what to say. How to say it. Or what to do. I think it’s not a lack of interest, it’s a lack of understanding. (And I’m not saying people need to help us. I’m not asking for help. I’m talking about the ones who actually are TRYING to help us or pray for us. Unsolicited.)
I talked to someone the other day who said quite honestly to me that she wished she knew what to say or do for me but she couldn’t even spend the energy THINKING about our family. Why? She has two healthy kids and is overwhelmed so her brain fritzes out even considering thinking about what my family dynamic would be like.
I get that on some level. But on another level, I think it’s a cop out. I didn’t ask this person for help. I wasn’t complaining to her. I didn’t act overwhelmed around her. She just came by the house to pick something up and I guess she felt guilty or something.
And the whole conversation seemed to me very, “I hope you get some clothes and food”. It’s as if the conversation had some benefit to HER because it certainly didn’t benefit me in any way. But I kept wondering what she got out of this? Why did she even bring it up? What was the purpose of mentioning it at all? I’m still at a loss actually.
But back to Kipper. Manny’s health is as stable as he’s ever been in most ways. His breathing is steady. He’s stronger. He’s been in the hospital very little. Mostly good news. But there is one area that seems to be declining (not ready to share yet). And it’s troublesome. It’s one of those that if God doesn’t intervene in a powerful, miraculous way, this story doesn’t go well.
This morning, for example, he woke up crying uncontrollably. That’s new. It’s not like him at all. He’s normally a chipper thing … even when in pain or sick. But this new thing is painful and progressive. While he’s awake he’s in control of his emotions. But when he’s in the twilight between awake and asleep, his emotions sometimes take over and it overwhelms him.
I fight so hard for his quality of life. I fight for pain control. I fight for peace of mind. And right now, it seems a losing battle.
So imagine I said to him that I wished for him, “Get well soon”. Seems cold and distant. Instead, I would rather say, “Get well NOW”. If it were in YOUR power to do that, wouldn’t you do that?? Wouldn’t you do anything in your power to get the job done NOW? (Yes, I know that timing is everything and not everything can get an instant "NOW" answer.)
1) When someone is in need of something and it’s in your power to do something physically for them, do it.
2) When someone is in need of prayer, don’t just say you will pray, but actually DO it. In fact, don’t wait until you get home in private. Grab their hand and start praying right then and there. If it’s public, you can do it quickly and quietly if you need. But it is (usually) much more powerful to the person to actually HEAR the prayer. Feel free to say you’ll continue to pray about them and the situation. If they’re on the phone, pray then. If it’s via email, don’t just tell them you’ll pray, type out a prayer and send it to them. In other words … be INSTANT in prayer.
3) When you pray, do it with faith. Do it like you are praying to a God who is kind and compassionate and capable. Lay it at HIS feet.
4) Don’t be afraid of people who have a LOT on their plates. They are just regular people who are putting one foot in front of the other. Their load may be larger than yours but they don’t need extra burdens like judgmental statements or “you’ve got your hands full” kind of observations. They need encouragement, a listening ear, acts of kindness, etc.
5) Don’t compare yourself with others. It’s never wise. Afterall, we can only know the outside tip of the iceberg about what others are going through. We never know what it’s like to be walking in someone else’s shoes. And it’s rarely like we would imagine.
6) Be kind at all times. You truly never know what is going on in someone’s life. And everyone is always dealing with something. In fact, it’s probably best to assume they are and treat everyone with extra kindness than you think they deserve. (Like someone cuts you off in traffic? Instead of turning all type A and road-rage-aholic, perhaps you could give them the benefit of the doubt? What if you knew they were in a hurry because they just got word their daughter was in a car accident and they were trying to get to the hospital? Would that change how you felt about them?
7) Have the attitude of “Get well NOW”. See if that doesn’t shift your thinking.