March 28,
2013
One of the
most difficult times of being a mother is when we are 99% sure we’re
right. You see, when I’m 100% convinced,
I’m a bulldog (yet try to stay calm and kind).
But when there is that doubt, however slight, it nags on my psyche in a
detrimental way.
Manny said, "Mom, it's raining. I have an umbrella!" |
What am I
talking about? Remember back when Manny
was in the hospital in August with Human Metapneumo Virus? Well, it was by far the worst he’d ever been
sick with respiratory issues. His heart
rate through the roof, his breathing rate through the roof, etc. I knew with 99% certainty that he was in
trouble, needed to be on bipap and put in the ICU. But I couldn’t convince anyone else of that. My regular peeps were gone and so no one was
there that knew to trust my rather accurate “gut”. Even the ICU doctor wasn’t convinced I was
right and he ended up even sicker.
In
September, he got similar symptoms again.
But this time, I was 100% sure. I
KNEW. I got different results. I didn’t hesitate.
I liken it
to being on a roadtrip to a new destination where I’ve never been. I can see the signs, I can guestimate, but I
don’t know for sure. But once I’ve been
on a road before, I know where all the gas stations are, the potholes,
etc.
Currently,
Manny is sick again. His labs are
“off”. Today, the (new) GI had her nurse
ask me if I’d consider trailing feeds again?
Well … I’ve been on this road 1000 times! Each time it ends the same way. I’m not real keen on getting back on this
road again. If you’ve been reading this
blog at all … you’re probably not real keen on it either!
I wanted to
tell the nurse HECK no. (OK, that’s the
“edited version” of what I thought! LOL)
But instead I told her I would consider it if I could have a long,
detailed conversation with the GI about how to protect him through the
trials. In my head I thought this would
just buy me some time. (I have an
appointment with the GI next Wednesday.)
After I hung
up, I realized the best way to handle it.
On Wednesday, I will see if she brings it up. If she does, then I will ask her to outline
her plan. I will have on hand the
document I will create that outlines all his previous feeding trials and
results. (I’m assuming what she will
suggest will have already been tried!)
And if she pushes for it, rather than being the resistant one who is non
compliant … I will say she needs the Pulmonologist clearance prior to the
feeding trial. That he will need to be
on board and have a say of when to pull the plug on the experiment, etc. I know good and well that the Pulmonologist
will have a proverbial cow about even talking about it! Then it’s a doctor
saying no and not just me.
But the
bottom line is … I have doubt. I’m 100%
percent sure this will be a bad idea to trial feeds. He’ll end up in the hospital with respiratory
distress in no time. That’s not the
doubt. The question in my head is … at
what cost? And what if I’m wrong?
But that’s
my decision. No feeds without a clearer
plan.
April 7 …
Fast
forward. Manny’s labs on April 1 were
back to “normal” again. The liver
enzymes (the ones the GI freaked out about) were back to his baseline and even
slightly lower. Like I had thought, it
was a fluke, not the beginnings of liver failure. I was right to say no to the feeds.
April 3 is
when I went back to the GI and even though the labs were back fine, she was
still hinting around about the feeds. I
get it. Really do! I mean, a GI’s job is to get the digestive
tract thing going/working.
What she
doesn’t know is the first hand hell that we experience every time in ever
increasing horrors. She has never been
there to see him gasping for breath or his heart rate near 300. She’s never heard him begging for help as he
basically drowns in his own secretions.
We instead
discussed how we could get to a mitochondrial doctor. Maybe they have some suggestions and places
to start! Perhaps they could help guide
the GI portion of his care in the future.
So we’re working on trying to locate the right doctor and right
direction to head.
Meanwhile,
Manny’s been sick since adenoid surgery.
I say “adenoid” because … did you know?
There is only one adenoid? People
say they had their adenoids taken out but really it’s just one big one? Just a little factoid for you.
Anyway, once
that came out, he has had troubles ever since.
Everything has settled in his tonsils and is blocking his airway. He’s having trouble breathing. Needing oxygen. It’s quite sad and scary. Then his tonsils looked like strep and he got
his first ear infection so they put him on an antibiotic that went in his
feeding tube. That had no effect. So we had to get the IV version. (Long story short, this shouldn’t take an act
of congress to get but it does for some reason.) But we got it.
Another
thing happened one day during all of this … not sure why but Manny got choked
and couldn’t breathe. It was quite
scary. I had been in the kitchen cooking
and then stepped out for a second and the kids yelled for me. I ran and saw he wasn’t breathing at
all. I started praying and trying to
clear his airway. Then I had one kid go
run get Dan in his office. He stayed
with Manny and prayed for him while I ran to my bedroom for some supplies. I was eventually able to clear it and all was
well. But those were a few scary
minutes. I still don’t know what
happened but man! Those episodes seem to
take years off your life. (I hope
not!)
And finally
about Manny … he still has a horrible diaper area rash. They think staph because of the way it
responds to antibiotics but it’s never been specifically swabbed. As soon as the antibiotics are done, it comes
right back. I won’t be overly
descriptive but suffice to say … it’s a rash that’s come and gone since
Thanksgiving and it bleeds it’s so bad. He
NEVER complains about it! Poor guy.
Here's a link of him waiting in the van at the doctor's office ... during this time, he had a fever, tonsilitis, an ear infection and a bleeding staph sore. Yet THIS is what he's like ... (It's worth checking out, trust me!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlFp72FPJ30&feature=youtube_gdata_player
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlFp72FPJ30&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Now … on to
a completely new topic …
On Friday,
March 29, Luke (9) started acting a little “off”. It wasn’t super noticeable but just a little
off. Low key. Low energy.
Low appetite. Headache, etc.
Saturday it was more noticeable.
Sunday he got a low grade fever.
In the middle of the night he came in saying, “I’m hot”. Luke is sometimes … uh, how do I put it …
overly dramatic. So at 3 am, I wasn’t
all that impressed with that sentence. I
told him to go get the thermometer.
“103.1” he
says. To which I bolted out of bed and
got that kid some medicine.
Monday
morning first thing we went to the Urgent care (out pediatrician was out sick
herself). They diagnosed him with strep
and a bad sinus infection. He had one
small white spot on the left tonsil. Started
him on Amoxicillin. I thought it was all
over. Strep is usually much much better
24 hours after starting antibiotics.
From Monday
to Thursday, his fever kept going up. At
one point it was over 105. He was having
some slight airway issues (on top of his asthma which got triggered).
Thursday
afternoon he said his throat was hurting more than ever. So I looked in his throat. Uh … it was disgusting! Both tonsils were COVERED in white nastiness
and they were both huge. His temp was
still over 104. The Doctor’s office is
closed on Thursday afternoons so back to the Urgent Care we went. (3 times in one week, twice with Luke and
once with Manny. And we hadn’t been
there in over a year prior to that!)
As I took this picture and this temperature, he said, "I TOLD you I was hot!" Gotta love 9 year old boys! |
It was a
different doctor and he agreed that the antibiotic should have taken care of
strep but those persistent high fevers and continued worsening of the tonsils
concerned him too. He gave us a new
antibiotic, Zithromax, just in case. He also
did a chest xray as he heard a little something in the middle lobe. Chest xray wasn’t all that impressive but as
I know (and he explained), chest xrays “lag” behind.
Here's when it's NOT so bad! |
By Friday
evening, (the 24 hour mark of the new antibiotic), he was starting to feel a
bit better. The fever was finally below
101. He was hungry for the first time in
a week. (Not much but a little.)
Just for
fun, as I was getting the kids ready for bed, I noticed Sam (11) and his cheeks
looked a bit flushed. I took him to the
light and noticed silver dollar sized marks on both cheeks that were red like a
sunburn color but there were tiny raised dots there too. Some kind of strange rash! I checked him from head to toe at that point
and found nothing else strange. (I then
thoroughly checked Jacob, Kaley and Zoe … thankfully nothing out of the
ordinary!)
On Saturday,
Luke started coughing up “chunks”. I
have no way to describe these things.
Bigger than peas but smaller than dimes.
Looked like his skin color but was covered in blood. Not massive amounts of blood, but super scary
looking. Meanwhile, he still was
sounding like wheezing to me. He was
doing round the clock nebulizer treatments.
They seemed to help for a little bit but not for long.
Then
Saturday afternoon, he came to me a bit freaked out … his lips were very, very
swollen! I immediately thought about
medications. He’d been on the new med
for several days by now and it is taken only once a day – at night. So I doubted it was this. But I never did find the source. It took HOURS for his lips to look back to
normal. In the meantime, I checked his
tongue and airway… all that looked just fine.
Sunday, he’s
having the darndest time with coughing.
He’s still coughing up some chunks, just less blood now. But his cough is uncontrollable unless he’s
during a nebulizer treatment. He’s
scheduled to see his regular doctor first thing Monday morning to help us with
the big picture. He no longer has any
fever but the tonsils still are quite “rough” looking.
So that’s
part of my update. You know, just a
regular “day in the life” type of stuff.
Ha.
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