I don't know about you ... but I find that God likes cliff-hangers! (I, on the other hand, do not.) I'm a planner. I think I find security, comfort in knowing at list the gist of what is coming so I feel I can be prepared. (I'm SURE I'm not alone on this.)
But God, He has other purposes. He wants me to be attached to Him. He wants me to rely on Him. And I can say I do ... but when it comes down to it, I often feel like I'm hanging on until 11:59 and then He swoops in and saves the day.
Now the trick would be for me not to worry until 11:59 has passed. I used to worry by 10 pm. Then my faith grew and I could postpone the worry until 11 pm. I think I'm up to about 11:30 before worry sets in now. So I'm getting better.
As I see it, it's 11:25 right now. I am not worried YET. But I also see my pending worry about to set it.
What to worry about? All the details and plans for the China trip have not come together yet. (Even the money is not quite all in ... close, but not quite. But He's provided the rest, I'm sure that will be available too in no time.)
The front half of the trip is all nicely tied up. From November 10-18 we're all set. We have a place to stay, places to eat, translators, transportation, etc. ahhhhh.
November 19-24 is a bit scattered still. So much so that I cannot get flights yet, no hotel yet, no driver. Now that can all come together pretty quickly since I have done the research and I just push the buttons. But I'm not even sure why we're supposed to be there all those days.
We're to meet the Director on November 19 - which means we'll leave New Day, to go Beijing airport, fly to Taiyuan and meet him somewhere that day. (Not at the orphanage I was just told today since all foreigners are forbidden to go due to H1N1.) Then November 20 we're to meet with Zoe's foster family. Where? When? That will fall in place too I'm sure. I just want it to be special and meaningful. Last time, it was a quick 30 minutes and we were outta there.
November 21? Nov 22? Beats the heck out of me. I think those days are about doing our Children's Home business around the province. No problem. But the person we're meeting with has to go back on Nov 22. We'll be in Taiyuan with no English speaking person for that whole day. Why? Originally I had tried to get the flight back home on that day and it was a NO-GO, already booked. So I know we'll be there for a reason... but what? And more importantly, it is in Taiyuan or are we supposed to go back to Beijing and have our divine appointment there??? And until I know this, I cannot book flights or hotels.
So ... that's what I mean by ... down to the wire. I leave in a week. This has to be decided before I go.
tick. tick. tick.
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